“History repeats itself, first as tragedy, second as farce.” —Karl Marx
Remember that nasty Viet Nam War? Well, when NVA got going, I convinced the Congress and President Johnson that everything was swell. The Tet Offensive had just proven that we were on a roll and could take care of “Charlie” like the great army we were. Only problem was we left after they gave us just about everything we asked for but the time to accomplish our mission.
It seems my clone, David Petraeus has just pulled the same stunt on the Congress. Difference being that I didn’t have to convince President Bush. I was really there to pull his bacon out of the fire by testifying how well we’re doing. You know all the good things we’ve done for the Iraqis. How much their lives have improved since they all got purple fingers. How safe it is to walk around not only Baghdad but outside the green zone, (provided you’ve got a flak jacket, helmet and a convoy of trigger-happy Blackwater safety contractors .) Just ask John McCain. “Straight Talk Express,” I tell you.
It looks like we’re gonna be in Iraq forever, thanks to me and, yes, General Petraeus.
And I'm still dead. Me and about 3800 grunts.