Friday, April 13, 2007

Got The World On A String, Sittin’ On A Rainbow, Got The String Around My Finger...Heh, Heh.

“Do not conquer the world with force, for force only causes resistance. Thorns spring up when an army passes. Years of misery follow a great victory. Do only what needs to be done without using violence.—Tao Te Ching

“It's a man's world,” sang James Brown. That's exactly what George Bush apparently thinks. And he thinks he’s the Man.

“See this little spot over here,” the president said at a press conference recently, “that’s Aye-rack, and that’s where all the evil-doers live. We chased ’em there from Afghanistan. Now they are doin’ evil there and if we let them do evil there, and we leave, then they’ll follow us over here and do evil.

“Now I know some of ya’ll think I tricked ya when
I invented the Surge and said we were planning a new way forward. Well I did, didn’t I. And ya’ll fell for it. Heh, heh! And instead of 12,500 troops it'll be up to 48,000 real soon.”

A member of the press corp corrected the president, pointing to the globe in his hands saying, “Mr. President, that little spot... is Guam.”

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Joke ’em If They Can’t Take A #%&*!

Good thing Don Imus has *&%# you money. Sure he said something stupid. Don't we all. I personally think Imus is an old curmudgeon on his way out with ratings already in the toilet. I don't listen to him and probably never will.

What was he thinking? I'll tell ya. In his clubby little room at the station, he thought he'd toss out some trash talk to make himself sound, hip. Like he's really with it. And why not quote some rap lingo in the ghetto-style tongue to prove he really is "in" when it comes to understanding the culture. What’s wrong with a little locker room humor among cronies? The answer is nothing is wrong with it. Unless someone is offended. People have rabbit ears these days. Everyone is insecure and paranoic. Everyone is out to get you. "It's all about me!" Well guess what. It's not.

Just ask Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson and the entire Rutgers women’s basketball team. Someone stole their moment of fame. What? Didn't they just lose the championship to the Tennessee Volunteers womens team. Be glad that you didn't have to come home in disgrace for having lost the championship and thank your lucky stars that Imus died for your sins.

STFU and move along. There’s nothing to see here.