Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Where’s Dick Been?

Evidently Dick has made so much money, he’s been packing for the last few days at his undisclosed secret location at the Fortress of Solitude where he’s been licking his wounds after his most recent snub by the leaders of Uzbekistan or one of the other Stans. When reached for comment, Cheney said, “Go f**k yourself.”

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

McCain Learns Something...From Karl Rove, Lenin and Goebels

If you tell the same lie consistently and often it will appear to be the truth, and unless challenged, will be accepted by the American people as the truth. If not refuted it, may as well be the truth. Unfortunately, it is not that the majority of the American people have a real problem with the substance or lack of substance of these lies. They are a diversion.

This, sadly, America, is how you really think about Barack Obama and why you are afraid of him.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Forgetfulness, Like An Old Trusted Friend Lulls Us To Complacency

It’s beginning to look like the country has forgotten what the last eight years have lead us to. The economy is in the tank. The taxpayer is in constant peril of bailing out financial institutions which the government neglected to properly watch. The price of fuel and food is skyrocketing. Unemployment is rising. And no one seems to have the proper amount of health insurance. We strut around the world telling sovereign nations what to to to help us out and they laugh at us. We try to buy friends and are rightly snubbed.

Now we’re told that a governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin as Vice President would make all the difference in the world. That this gun-toting, wolf-shooting, salmon-fishing moose gutter is ready and fit to lead our country should the actuarial tables prove the odds correct. She has breathed new life into the crypt keeper, John McWheeze, and empowered the every woman in America to have a Down syndrome baby of her own. With her nasal, whining voice she has shown her ignorance of the most dangerous foreign policy of our day, the Bush doctrine, which states that if you concoct enough evidence of “imminent” threat you can blow the shit out of any country you want like a nice neighbor gone bad, shooting the kids on his lawn with a shotgun only they aren’t on his lawn, they’re in their beds next door.

My country, wrong or wrong. Hey, what are YOU doing here?

Thursday, September 04, 2008

Conservative Three Ring Circus

Come one, come all! The big show has already begun. We’ve got Larry “Wide-Stance-Gobbler” Craig. We’ve got Rudy “Third-Time’s-The-Charm” Guiliani, Newt “Here-Are-Your-Divorce-Papers-You Cancer-Riddled-Bitch” Gingrich and The Two-Timing ex-POW John “The Songbird Adulterer” McCain.

For your added enjoyment, may we present the Queen of Trailer Trash, Sarah “Can’t-Keep-My-Knees-Together” Palin. She will shoot apples off the tops of all her children whilst crooning like Francis McDormond. Uff-da!

Wait, wait. It's not what it looks like. Well, OK. It is what it looks like, but I can explain.

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Right Wing Sideshow Freaks Go Mad!

As usual, the first casualty of any battle is truth. The disgusting pigboy of the EIB Network, the pundit of the Rush Limbaugh Institute for the study of Conservatism went on a blasphemous tirade today. Screeching like a tea kettle boiling over, this pompous ass proceeded to eviscerate the media, the democrats, the liberals and almost anyone who disagreed with him. He kept up the vomit for his three hours, calling people asses for calling him the hypocrite he is while pretending to be a Godly, forgiving Christian. A pro life idiot who believes in teaching abstinence, condemns sex education and doesn't realize how badly an unwanted pregnancy can screw up a promising life. He will defend to the death (or at least a little pain) the right of Sarah Palin to force your daughter to have her rapist’s baby!

Monday, September 01, 2008

Why The Blank Stare?

I don’t know what five years of torture can do to a man...and quite frankly I don‘t want to find out the hard way.

I know it can make someone do strange things.