It’s beginning to look like the country has forgotten what the last eight years have lead us to. The economy is in the tank. The taxpayer is in constant peril of bailing out financial institutions which the government neglected to properly watch. The price of fuel and food is skyrocketing. Unemployment is rising. And no one seems to have the proper amount of health insurance. We strut around the world telling sovereign nations what to to to help us out and they laugh at us. We try to buy friends and are rightly snubbed.
I don’t know what five years of torture can do to a man...and quite frankly I don‘t want to find out the hard way.
The problem with zombies is that most of the time they just won’t die. They’re tricky and hard to put down permanently. That’s the real problem. They just keep groaning, moving inexorably, and shuffling along in an effort to get more brains. And the poor things don’t even know they’re dead! Usually they are capable of holding their arms no higher than their shoulders as they pursue their prey. The only way to stop them is to vote against them in November.
Resigned to fate, is about all you can say. 
Those madcap boys are at it again! More fun than a barrel. More humor than the inside of an eyeball. More laughs than a hyena. Only George and Dick can bore a hole and they don’t know where. The need John McCain to tell them to “Drill now, drill here...right here” where presumably his feet are standing.
$400 million and this is what you get. Clear Channel ought to have its heads examined. Thirteen million ditto-headed clones who believe this crackpot to be the voice of conservatism, who in reality is no more than an ugly slug crawling on the national cabbage, spewing hatred and divisiveness under the guise of morality. What a hypocrite.
Yes. They’re back. Those scary monsters that used to hide under your bed, in your closet when you were a kid! And they’re gonna getcha! They’ve already taken over the country. Now they’re coming for your family. Your wife, your children and there’s nothing you can do to stop them. Now the pods are everywhere. Even your home town. There’s one of them that looks just like you! And you can’t seem to keep from falling asleep. Sleep well, America. George and his creepy friends are awake.
“It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.” —George Burns
Visiting Iowa in hope that he might garner a few votes from Obama supporters, Senator John McCain munched on a corn dog and blathered farm gibberish to Miss Iowa Pork. Miss Pork smiled in a kind way toward the withered up, white haired senator and asked him what movies he’d made since Miracle on 34th Street. She’d loved him as Fred Mertz in I love Lucy, too.
President Bush was seen staggering drunkenly through the beach volleyball venue at the 2008 Olympic games. It would appear that his adult beverage of choice was an expensive single malt scotch whisky and that he didn’t seem to hold it any better than any other alcohol he’d abused before. High-fiving the athletes and smacking ass, Dubya chanted “USA, USA...oops don’t tell Pickles, Shhhhh!”
In what could be described as a drug deal gone wrong, Premier Putin of Russia apparently bought a pig in a poke. Haggling for souls at the Olympic Games on Monday, Putin put in a bid for George W. Bush’s immortal spirit. Unfortunately, when he got it back to his hotel room he found he had been swindled.
And, since no one could agree, with one whack, Solomon cut the Democratic Party in half.
That’s why he set himself on fire like a Buddhist monk and burned himself to death. Good boy, Glenn.“Sometimes you gotta do what’s right for the country” —Glenn Beck
Since most Americans are not easily frightened of invading hordes of radical Muslims and Taliban fighters wading ashore in Ocean City New Jersey, it was necessary to find a more insidious means of scaring the country into compliance so that the Patriot Act would pass and grant all kinds of extra powers to the executive branch.
There’s an old saying. “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
The criminals will get away with it and there is nothing anyone can do about it. The only good news is that it is doubtful that they will be doing lot of international travel in the near future. It took Simon Rosenthal a long time, but he finally nabbed Eichman. Think good thoughts and maybe justice will someday be done. Oh wait a minute. What am I saying. Never mind. THAT will never happen.
“President Bush and his administration have tried to pull the wool over our eyes and distract the public from this possibly illegal domestic spying scandal.” —Ellen Tauscher
It's official. Telecommunication companies are in the clear. By abetting the illegal, warrant-less wiretapping for the Bush administration’s “war” on terror, seems like everyone but 26 democrats caved in and voted for the new FISA bill. Even Obama, seeming to want to prove he's just another politician with feet of clay, who swore he'd never let them off the hook, now seems to think that he should abuse the constitution as well. Shame on these people. They’re supposed to uphold the constitution, not render it useless by ignoring it.
Where's Amelia Earhart when you could use a good female running mate?
President Nuri al-Maliki and President Mahmood Ahmadinejad going out on a date in Tehran recently.
